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18 January 2012 @ 03:38 pm
This one thing has been going on and on in my mind for a while now.  For my whole school life so far, I got along with people from here and there, but I've never really had a group of friends.  Both of my sisters have a nice big group where everyone is friends with each other.  I never got to have that feeling.  Last year was pretty good, since I started getting along really well with the people at my round lunch table, but it was just that year.  Sure I still talk to them from time to time now, but we were never close enough to be called a close group of friends.  I don't know if it's just me or if the generation that I was born in just doesn't have many good people.  The people in the same grades as my sisters all sound so nice and friendly, but now, all of the younger people just want to grow up so quickly.  If you look at them, they all look and act as if they were in high school.  It was definitely not like that for my sisters.  When they were in middle school, everyone was still child-like and didn't seem to care much about appearance, popularity, that kind of stuff.  It just seems kind of unfair to me, that the newer generations are becoming like this.  I wish I wasn't born in this year...really.  Why couldn't I be born in 1993?  That's when my sister was born, and there are so many clever, talented, spirited students in that generation.  That was like...the last good generation.  It went downhill from there.  All of my fellow classmates seem like high school students, well not as mature of course, but they're just all so outgoing and popular whereas I feel like I'm just sticking around, bothering the people that I do talk to.  I'm generally a quiet, shy person and there has not been a year where I was not told, "Why are you so quiet?"  I don't know what I should do.  I'm so worried about the later years in my school life where everyone is beginning to become more independent.  I still do not have friends and I've been kind of clingy as a child, since I am the youngest after all.  The youngest child usually matures slower since they are nurtured by more people?  That's how it was for me.  What if I cannot be independent and I become to clingy to my friends and they start to find me annoying?  I'm so worried about my social life.  My sister keeps saying, "Who cares?  It doesn't matter," stuff like that, but I can't not care.  It's so hard.  Ever since I changed so much in that one year of becoming a teen, I've thought about everything, social life, friends, really important.  It's easy for my sisters to say all that since they already have a nice group of friends of their own!  I've been so upset about this that there were times that I've cried myself to sleep. 

I apologize for this long post.  I just suddenly had the urge to get out all of my feelings since I don't have anyone that would actually care to listen.  This journal is the only place where I can probably get out all of my true feelings.  No one has ever known them before.  I'm really close to my second oldest sister (I have two older sisters, by the way) and I usually tell her everything, but she has a carefree attitude and doesn't care about stuff like feelings and stuff.  My sisters find that annoying.  They tell me I'm one of those weird girls that have so many feelings and emotions that have a diary and journal that they write everything in.  I'm not that bad, I tend to hold everything in.  Ah...this paragraph was supposed to be the end of this post, but I keep ranting on.  -.-"   

-sigh-  I feel much lighter now that I've typed everything out. 

...I'll try not to be so emotional...  >>"

Current Mood: pessimisticpessimistic
Current Music: M. Street - Ask
17 January 2012 @ 01:49 pm
How has everyone been doing?  :) 

When was the last time I was on here?  ...October?  o u o"  I should really come on here more. 

2011 has been full of unpleasant memories so hopefully I'll be able to make some new ones this year.  Last year...I don't even know what was going on in my mind.  I was always focused on trying to talk more and becoming like others, but I feel like some people have come to dislike me.  Of course, I have made plenty of new friends but I have no one I can consider a true or best friend.  They all have their own best friends to always stick around with.  I really like the quote that Dr. Seuss made: "Those that care, don't matter.  Those that matter, don't care."  When I was younger, I definitely got along with a bunch of people since I didn't care about friends, or what I looked like.  That stuff never even crossed my mind.  Once I hit my growth spurt, that stuff just came hitting at me.  I know it's normal, but I wish that it had never happened.  My oldest sister is still exactly the same as she always was and has so many close friends that she always goes out with.  She doesn't really care about appearance much, she's smart, and everyone takes a liking to her. 

This year I really want to change myself and I want to try to find out who I really am.  I've been trying to act like others far too much so I probably got annoying.  So far I think I've been able to change a little bit since I've gotten more comfortable at school, and I've gotten along with new people.  I'm going to kind of restart everything and try not to care so much.  Hopefully I can find someone that will accept the way I am and understand how I feel.  c: 

Thanks for listening to my rant again, haha. 

-Have a Lovely Day!-

Peetaroll ♥
Current Mood: refreshedrefreshed
Current Music: Hyuna - A Bitter Day
15 October 2011 @ 03:31 pm
I want it to be winter already.  ; u ;  That's when I get to have my winter break and two-hour delays and everything, heehee.  The year before last year, it snowed so much over here that I had a whole week off.  It was so lovely, but my house had almost five days without electricity.  -shudders-  Oh...the memories.  =-="  I seriously need to buy some more winter clothes though.  If you look into my closet, it's mostly short sleeves, skirts, and shorts, haha.  Whenever I do go shopping, the stores never have warm sweaters.  Urgh, I have to go back Asia soon and stock up on my clothes there.  The clothes over there are so cheap, whereas in America, if you want to get pretty clothes with good material, one shirt costs like $50 and at another store, I found one plain white shirt that was $75.  -sigh-  It's just ridiculous... 

Well, thanks for listening to my ranting, once again.  <3

~Have a Lovely Day~


Current Location: Home
Current Mood: blahblah
Current Music: U-Kiss - Take Me Away
12 September 2011 @ 12:13 am
Where were you?
Current Music: Youngwoong Jaejoong - Protect the Boss OST
01 September 2011 @ 03:05 pm
- Ugh...school -- have to go back in..five days.  FML.  OTL  ...Homework... 

So like, there's this girl at school, and I've noticed that whenever she sees me or something, she just stares at me, and I look back, but she's still staring like there's something on my face.  I have no idea what's wrong with her.  :/  She's not one of those really popular girls, but she does have a lot of friends...I think?; it's not like she's one of those weird people, if you know what I mean.  She doesn't do anything, she just stares.  "Like, what's your problem, girl? Seriously!"  Sometimes I'm just talking with my group of friends in a class, and I catch her staring at me from the other side...I don't get it.  o.o"  She was in my gym class as well, and when I come out of the locker room she stares at me with that kind of...'bossy' look?  I don't know how to describe it, but it's not just one of those "looking into space stares".  Oh whatever, it's not that big of a deal, but she really gets on my nerves.
Current Mood: annoyedannoyed
Current Music: U-Kiss's new song, "Neverland"
26 August 2011 @ 06:55 pm
I'm currently writing a Role-play with a friend about Kyuhyun and Sungmin, haha. We've actually been going on for a while now. It may take a really long time to finish it, but when we finally finish, I'll post it on here? >3 It's basically about Kyuhyun, being the poor one, and Sungmin, the rich, girly-ish one, and how they develop trust and some Bromance with each other. Kyuhyun gets a full scholarship to cover all finances required to enter this...Sungkyunkwan University. He ends up having a roommate, Sungmin, that loves the color pink and is wonderful at cooking. Kyuhyun, on the other hand, being the only male left in his family, had to take care of his mother and his older sister, Cho Ara. His best subject is math, of course. Ever since he was a child he always attended and won math competitions. Yeah, yeah, I'm sure you get the idea now. If I don't post it on my LiveJournal, then it's probably in some community for KyuMin. xD   I'll post the link for it on here, if I ever do get to finish it.  .---. 

Don't read it if you're not interested and are just going to post spam on it!  It's only for KyuMin fans!  D< 


~Have a Wonderful Day~

Current Mood: chipperchipper
Current Music: Whistle of Zephyr 西風的話 Studio version (Super Junior KRY)
18 August 2011 @ 07:16 pm

Urrgh, I absolutely hate it when my face gets all bloated and puffy in the mornings. . .D<  I hate it when this happens.  OTL 
Can't-look-at-myself-in-the-mirror...  Dr. Meanho...>.>"  I've considered my face puffiness to be my baby fat, but I've been like this since I was little.  D<  I'm underweight comparedto most people my age and height, but I have chubby cheeks.  \v.v/  Forsome reason, my whole family says that I look about five years younger than my actual age.  It always feels so weird at school.  Practically all Asians look younger than most people, so I guess that's a good thing?  8D"  I've also considered it to be my birthday.  I'm one of those people that started school earlier so I'm usually a year younger than everyone.  Plus my birthday is in August, so I always become the same age as my classmates a lot later.  -.-

Current Mood: crankycranky
15 August 2011 @ 01:33 pm
Oh my, this series is way too cute for me to handle.  *o*  Rin-chan's faces in the anime/manga are so adorable. ><  I was searching it up on Facebook one day, and someone posted a spoiler that I accidentally read. ; __ ;  I couldn't help but not read it, it was just sitting there, at the very top of the page.  Hopefully they don't go that far in the anime. 
I'm so excited that this is going to turn into a live-action movie though!  Here's a teaser photo:
The trailer is so adorable ~  If anyone wants to watch it, go here:
www.youtube.com/watch  c: 

Doesn't it look so cute?  -squeals-  I'm glad that they chose good actors.  Uhuu, you people should definitely watch the anime and read the manga.  I prefer reading the manga first, and then the anime, but it's your choice. 

Bye bye ~ :)

Current Mood: confusedconfused
Current Music: Sweet Drops by Puffy
13 August 2011 @ 04:54 pm
I recently told my sister about "The Hunger Games" since most of her friends have read the trilogy already so she bought the first book.  While she was reading she started giggling every time she saw the name, "Peeta", saying that it reminded her of pita bread, haha.  I was actually going to make my username, 'Peetabread' but it was taken, therefore I went along with Peetaroll.  c:  I was searching "The Hunger Games" on Deviant Art and I almost peed myself when I saw all of those drawings making fun of how Peeta camouflaged himself in the woods, haha. 

Here's one that I really loved:


The picture above is really cute.  It's a sketch of Katniss and Gale.  :)  I'm excited for the movie coming up, although I kind of dislike the actor playing Peeta.  He looks way too buff and old to play Peeta.  The actor should have kind a cute look, right?  I was thinking...Alex Pettyfer, but on second thought he seemed too handsome and too celebrity-like to play Peeta, who should be like the boy next door.  I think William Moseley would be a perfect Peeta though.  He's not extremely good looking, but cute, like Peeta should be.  Seriously, search this guy on Google Images and tell me what you think.  x)  Otherwise I think the actress for Katniss and the actor for Gale are pretty good. 

Current Mood: chipperchipper